At the priesthood session of General Conference last week the men were told to step up and do better by Elder D. Todd Christofferson. He said "We cannot afford husbands and fathers who fail to provide spiritual leadership in the home... The Church and the world and women are crying for men, men will are developing their capacity and talents, who are willing to work and make sacrifices, who will help others achieve happiness and salvation."
This was one of the talks that had the greatest impact on me from conference. At times I have certainly acted the complete opposite of what the Lord expects of me. I have done what I needed to do to simply get by. My sense of urgency toward my responsibilities has been minimal. Why do more than necessary to make things happen? If I can build a home using one brick, why use two? Why use four when two would work? This seems to be the mentality of men these days.
I am trying to battle against this myself. I feel that I have come a long way when I look back upon my life, but when I look forward to the future I see how much more work I have to do to get even remotely close to where I need to be. It is a continual effort and requires a constant reminder from myself, for if I stop reminding myself of the necessary changes then I am simply falling back into the lazy manner I have been trying to get myself out of.
This past Saturday morning I woke up and went to a temple session. It had been too long since I had last attended and I needed the spiritual nourishment. My wife stayed home to watch the kids allowing me to do this and I sincerely appreciated her doing so. It's always nice to go together but Stephanie understood that I needed to go. As I sat on the temple I noticed that there were many more women in attendance than men. This is typical each time I attend the temple, but I recognized it more this time after Elder Christofferson's talk and it bothered me.
Before I continue on please understand that everything I have to say here applies to me as well. I am not excluded from what I have to say. I am certainly not saying that I am better than anyone else. I often feel the least of all men. This was my wake up call and I simply thought I'd share it with my brothers in the faith.
Men, where are we? I know we have work, home repairs, lawns to mow, cars to fix, and sleep to catch up on, but don't we also have a responsibility to ensure spiritual blessings for our families, as well as our own spiritual growth that will also benefit our families? Why are we not at the temple more? For those who don't have close access to a temple I'm sure that you attend as often as you can, but to those of us living within 30 minutes of a temple shouldn't we be there more often? Can we go to bed earlier so that we can get up early on a Saturday morning? Can we spend less time sitting and relaxing after we get home from a long work day and get things done that will free up some time to get to the temple later on in the week? Can we stand up from the computer or walk away from that game to get the important things done? Even as I write this I know there are other things I should be devoting my time to. I know we can make these changes because I've been able to work on doing this myself and I never thought I would be able to.
This doesn't just apply to attending the temple. This works for spending time with our families, giving our wives the attention and affection that they deserve, getting our home teaching done, as well as attending to our other callings and duties. Are our priorities set straight? Are we more devoted to the selfish or the selfless? Take your own personal measurement to see. After you've made your assessment know this - you are probably wrong. Show your findings to your wife and let her show you where you went wrong. She sees what you don't and that is a good thing. You may not always think so, but it is a very good thing.
Brethren, let us cast off the lazy, the procrastination, the minimal. Take upon yourself the burden, the exceptional, and the best. A swimmer gets to his destination faster by kicking than by lying still and floating. Kick brethren and get to where you need to be. If we all made these necessary changes and improvements can you imagine what the church would be like? Can you imagine the strength found in each family?
Allow yourself to see the potential in you that our Father in Heaven sees and all your improvements will come easier. Your desire will change. Your priorities will be refocused. Your relationship with your wife will improve, as it also will with your children. You will willingly accept your trials as moments of growth. Understand that your sacrifices will turn into your blessings. Throw yourself into the refiner's fire and great blessings will be yours. The perfection we are trying to attain may actually come within our reach. Brethren, that is how we will come to be like the Savior.
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