Get over yourself, get under others

Listening to conference over the last few days I came away with a few different things, but they are all tied together through one phrase that I was thinking of - "Get over yourself, get under others". There was so much focus on love, service, and families at this conference. Not that there hasn't been before, but there seemed to be more a pleading this time to it. There were a lot of fantastic messages that were shared. One of my favorites was President Monson's talk on change. "The only thing in this world that is consistent is change." We can either fight against it and get run over or get behind it and help push it along. Life was meant for change. Children grow up, families grow, aged parents die... all these things are inevitable. There is no point in resisting these things because eventually you will be left behind by all those who embraced these changes. Are all changes good? Most certainly not! Are changes bad? Definitely not. What makes a change easier to handle and deal with? By simply counseling with the Lord. In Alma we read, "Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day." How awesome is that! When these things come upon us take it to the Lord. Talk to him about it - He will lead you in the right direction. The other part to not forget about this scripture is to be thankful for that which the Lord has given you - including the changes.

We should strive more to serve others and stop being so concerned with ourselves. How hard is that to do? How often do you go through the day and think about something that affect you or your feeling? When we're concerned about ourselves too much, isn't that just pride getting in the way of our full potential? I will claim guilt to this. I do this often. It's my greatest stumbling block. How do we step over it? By serving others, as we have been counseled to do. Steph and I are moving in a few weeks and we hardly know any of our neighbors. We went to a block party earlier in the year, but that has been the most time we've spent with any of them. Could we have done better? Our own fears are what creates the labels that we are given. I'm afraid of talking to others that I don't know and that gives me the appearance of being standoffish. Do I consider myself that way? No, but it's hard for me to push past that fear. Most (not all!) of the problems that we face in life are created or caused by us. If you really think about that fact you will know it to be true. The things that make us comfortable, the things that we say, the offense that we choose to take... the list goes on. Knowing this doesn't make it any better, but at least knowing it is a step in the right direction. It's like in my classes at school - I always tell my students that it is okay to make a mistake while they are singing or playing an instrument, but they need to realize where the mistake was made, and then work really hard not to make the same mistake the next time that part of the song comes around. The same thing with life - when we know that our frailties are going to cause us to err and make a mistake we need to recognize where we did wrong so that the next time that situation comes along in life we can do it the right way instead.

A perfect example of that has taken place in my own life. I don't like to talk about it ever, but I was married once before. It was a mistake - a huge error on my part. When it ended I had learned from it. When Steph and I met I knew that we would get married, but I wasn't going to "sing the song wrong again". I learned, through my own suffering, and now I have the greatest gift that the Lord has ever blessed me with. The things that Stephanie does for me in my life are beyond words, but it wouldn't have happened without me doing two very important things - I counseled with the Lord in my doings, and recognized the corrections that I needed to make. Sometimes I wish I did a better job at remembering to do those two things when choices come along, because I still have the occasional struggle with my pride in making the right decision.

The third thing that I loved hearing about in conference was family. Especially some of the things that President Monson said. Families are forever. They are the central unit of our church and of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I know that in my past there have been times when I would have traded anything to be part of a family other than mine. Sometimes it is really hard to be part of that unit, but again, it boils down to getting over ourselves and getting under others. Do we serve members of our family as much as we do those outside of it? Do we consciously make the effort to go out of our way to serve, and in turn, love our family members more than anything else in the world? Make sure to give your child an extra hug or an extra "I love you". Tell your parents you love them when they least expect it. "Forgive me" are the second most important words a person can say to another behind, "I love you". There is no shame in saying those words. In fact, there is great glory in them.

I love how much conference makes me think about what I do that is wrong and what I can do to improve. There is so much work to do with myself and I can't wait to apply the things that I have learned. I am not expecting to get everything right the first time I try it - but hopefully I will fix those mistakes every time a new "verse" comes around. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is true! It truly does make bad people good and good people better. I love the Savior and His perfect example. He showed us exactly how to love others, especially as he hung on the cross and uttered "Father, forgive them". I hope that someday I will have the ability to say and do the same thing. The Savior put it best, "As I have loved you, love one another". Love is fantastic. It is a healing balm that we so often overlook for our wounded souls. Remember to love. Remember to love as the Savior did. I'm grateful for this knowledge that the Spirit has testified of to me, and I say these things ever so humbly, in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.