What do you see?

Today in my classes I am having my students watch "Mary Poppins" because I have had a cold for the past week and I seriously cannot sing. Today while I was watching the movie I was realizing the fantastic lines and words of wisdom from the movie. The line that jumped out at me today was "Sometimes the people that we love most, through no fault of their own, can't see past the end of their nose." There were two things that struck me most about that phrase. The first was that it can happen to anyone, including those that we love most. The second was that, sometimes it happens to these people that we love most and they don't even know it.

That got me thinking - when we see this happening to those around us in life we should not be the one to point it out to them in a manner that is demeaning or negative. We need to help them understand in a loving manner BECAUSE we love them most. If we blame them in an unkind way then we are destroying the love that we have for that person. We are, in turn, not seeing past the end of OUR own noses. Isn't it funny how that works out? Usually the problems we see in others are the very problems that we are struggling to overcome ourselves. While this may seem like a difficult situation, I believe that this presents us with a great opportunity.

It is so hard to deal with something difficult on our own. The loss of a loved one, the addiction of a destructive vice, the lack of patience in your life, or shortcomings you make as a member of the church - these are all problems that are dealt with. It will be so much better to go through these with the help of our loved ones than on our own. Will it make it easier? Most certainly. One of the great things about the relationship that Steph and I have is that when one of us is struggling (and it's me more often than not!) the other one takes the reins and lifts the other up. When we were living in Utah and I lost my job it was really hard for Steph. She was pregnant with Lainey, worried about finances and insurance, and struggling. It was hard for me too, but for some reason I was blessed with the strength to be optimistic in a situation when I normally would not have been. I was able to transfer that optimism to Steph and pull her up. She's done the same thing for me in other situations. An example of that was this summer when our car was broken into. I was so upset about it (amongst other things) and Steph pulled me up and over the pessimistic speed bump I was creating for myself. How fantastic is that! We just have this natural balancing act that we have achieved.

But how much better would it be if I asked for help, for example, in making sure I say my prayers every morning and night. I will admit that I don't always get it done. By asking Steph to help me make sure to get that done right I guarantee that it will also carry into her own life. As she reminds me to make sure I say my prayers she will have that reminder to say her's as well. (Not that she doesn't! Steph is on top of that.) This goes back to "Get over yourself and get under others".

The other thing that is important to remember is not to fault those we love. I love the lesson Christ taught about casting stones. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." Sometimes I feel like I am carrying around a whole pocketful of stones to just start throwing when I see something wrong. But if I can't see past the end of my own nose the only person I am going to end up hitting with my stones is me. This is so hard to do because it is like a trait that everyone is born with. Most of the time that we fault others we don't even realize that we are doing it! We are so wrapped up in the wrong that's been done to us that we don't see how we are part of the problem. We don't step back to see how we could help the situation instead of making it worse. A line from a great song says "Will it make it easier on you now you've got someone to blame?" Does it make it easier on us? Initially, but that goes away really fast, and then we are left with more blame.

Maybe in seeing those who we love not being able to see past the end of their nose we are only limiting our own vision. Ask for help and offer help. Accept it and give it. By doing so we will achieve the unity that President Monson spoke to us about, and you know there is nothing better than being united with those you love most. There is a calming and holy feeling to being able to know that you are united in your cause, united in your battle, united in your love. This is a battle worth fighting for, and your's is a nose worth seeing past.